#BlogElul 3: Bless

August 28, 2014 by Rosanna Wertheimer

Yesterday I got to take a walk in the woods at one of my very favorite places, Caratunk Audubon Refuge. It is the place where I experience HaMakom, the name for God meaning just that: "the place." It is where I feel closest to God.

Yesterday I recited the morning blessings on my walk, taking my time with each word, savoring each name of God, opening my eyes wide to my surroundings: the birds, frogs, dragonflies, butterflies, and chipmunks; the trees, flowers, berries, mushrooms, and moss; the trickle of a stream, the still waters of a pond, the ancient rocks and boulders. I know this place well and I savor every detail of its constantly changing, complex eco-system.

Every time I walk in Caratunk, I think to myself at least once, "I am the luckiest person in the world." What an enormous blessing it is to be able to soak in the beauty of this beloved place. What an enormous blessing it is to have such spacious time to myself.

And when I overflow with gratitude, I become like a fountain of blessings, giving and receiving.

Baruch atah adonay, eloheynu chey ha'olamim, oter yisrael betifarah. Blessed are you, the beautiful, our God, life of all the worlds, who crowns Israel with splendor.

#BlogElul 2: Act

August 27, 2014 by Rosanna Wertheimer

When I chant birchot ha'shachar (morning blessings), I use the sequence of 15 blessings from the Kol Haneshamah prayerbooks. Their translation for the ninth blessing, Baruch atah adonay eloheynu chey ha'olamim she'asah li kol tzorki is "Blessed are you, The Generous, our God, life of all the worlds, who acts for all my needs." (Most other translations translate she'asah as "who provides", or sometimes "who supplies or prepares." )

Who acts for all my needs.

This is the blessing that gives me the most trouble. This is the blessing that on many a day makes me angry. Usually I am not angry on my behalf because on most days I feel grateful for the ways big and small that my needs are cared for. I recognize how fortunate I am.

But I also recognize that so many others are not so fortunate. Isn't God also acting for their needs?

I get especially angry when I think of all the children who do not have enough to eat, are homeless, or even worse do not have parents or caregivers who are loving them and tending to their emotional needs. I think of the children who are abandoned, abused, enslaved, imprisoned and my heart aches.

I simply do not understand why so many children suffer such shocking deprivations. Where is God for those children? If God acts for all my needs, surely God acts for their needs too.

So what does it mean that God acts?

For today, my best answer to these age-old questions is to pray that God helps those suffering feel less alone in their suffering. And I pray that I might be one of many vessels of God, that my actions might serve to meet the needs of my loved ones, my community, and all humanity.

and maybe even this frog too...

#BlogElul 1: Do

August 26, 2014 by Rosanna Wertheimer

It is time again to DO Elul, to DO reflection, to DO the work of turning and returning, of reckoning.

Do I have any ideas about what to do with do?
Do I want to ask a set of questions?
Do I dare declare that I will write daily for this month?
Do I stare into space wondering what to do?
Do I listen to the crickets, the chorus of late summer sounds?
Do I pause in the sweetness of anticipation, the last long days before the school year begins?
Do I watch my anxiety rise as I worry about how this coming year will go?
Do I let go of what might have been and step boldly into this new phase of my life?
Do I know what I want to do next?
Do I furrow my brow in deep concentration as I try to formulate questions from this summer of strife?
Do I dare to hope that my work in the world might just make a difference?
Do I allow myself to be shattered by the terrible realities of how we humans treat each other and the earth?
Do I know how to allow light and growth to fill in the new spaces the shattering opens?